


I'll Take Your Firsts and Everything that Comes Along with It

by blankcamellia, geeelatinnn



Series: Warm and Safe [3]
Category: SixTONES (Band)
Genre: Do not read if you're under 18, Enjoy!, First Times, Fluff, Juri's apartment and its wonders, M/M, Romance, Safety, Sex, Shin has a cameo, Uncertainty, idk okay, they do it okay?, they're adorable, warmth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-02
Updated: 2020-08-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:20:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25667326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blankcamellia/pseuds/blankcamellia, https://archiveofourown.org/users/geeelatinnn/pseuds/geeelatinnn
Summary: Hokuto's attention snapped to their direction and watched as Taiga left with Juri. Why was he leaving with Juri? And a million other questions rushed through his mind but the most worrying of all was where could Juri be possibly taking Taiga? If Juri was taking Taiga to his apartment… oh god. Hokuto choked on his own breath.
Relationships: Kyomoto Taiga/Matsumura Hokuto
Series: Warm and Safe [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1853086
Comments: 6
Kudos: 25





	I'll Take Your Firsts and Everything that Comes Along with It

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first co-author work with @blankcamellia and it was really something I'm thankful for. I do not regret just suddenly [and shamelessly] asking her if she'd agree to co-author with me because the result was beautiful. Hopefully this wouldn't be the last since she's really good at writing and you should check out her dashboard for more more more more Kyomohoku fics.
> 
> We hope you enjoy this adorable pairing as much as we do because well, it's Kyomohoku and they're adorable.

Hokuto dreaded the time when they would have a rehearsal break. Especially since he noticed Juri was eyeing him and Taiga and the subtle gestures that implied sexual innuendos Juri was doing when he was sure Hokuto was about to glance at his direction. But Hokuto did not have to face a confrontation he dreaded because Juri did not pester him during rehearsal break as Taiga approached Juri as soon as they were told to take a break.

Hokuto watched them from a distance, wondering what they were talking about. Wondering why the hell they were seated with almost no space between them. Wondering why the hell they had to whisper to each other and laugh like they didn't have a care in the world.

The whole day, Juri and Taiga were inseparable and the whole day Hokuto secretly watched them. Convincing himself that this was pretty much normal as they were in the same group after all and they've known each other from way back. Way back. Hokuto then remembered how touchy Juri and Taiga were when they were all younger. He shrugged the thought off of his mind, tried to focus on something else.

When rehearsals ended, Hokuto was hoping for a note from Taiga or something. Anything at all that would be a sign that Taiga would come over his place tonight. But there was nothing. Everyone was still inside the dressing room so Hokuto fixed his things as slowly as he could, maybe Taiga would stay behind to tell him something or whatever. He had his hopes up but tried not to let it show through much in his actions.

"Kyomo, you ready to go?" Juri asked.

Hokuto's attention snapped to their direction and watched as Taiga left with Juri. Why was he leaving with Juri? And a million other questions rushed through his mind but the most worrying of all was where could Juri be possibly taking Taiga? If Juri was taking Taiga to his apartment… oh god. Hokuto choked on his own breath.

"You okay there, buddy?" Shintarou asked, lightly tapping Hokuto's back. "You're so pale. What's up?" Shintarou leaned on the table as he ate his apple.

"Shin," Hokuto did not like what was going on in his mind but he just had to ask. "How long has it been since you've been to Juri's?"

"A little over three weeks. Why?" 

Hokuto choked on his own breath again. Three weeks? But Hokuto also hadn't been over there for a month. If he puts two and two together then Juri probably hadn't had meaningless sex with anyone and he might have Taiga for his next target. Poor, sweet, innocent Taiga might get devoured by Juri tonight. He fell down on his chair, his thoughts proving a little too much for him.

"Hey, you okay?" Shintarou's voice had a hint of worry in them.

"He left with Taiga today," Hokuto blurted his thoughts out loud.

"Oh~" Shintarou chuckled a little. "Well, Juri knows what he's doing. Kyomo's lucky, Juri is very gentle with virgins. You should know, he was your first too."

"No!" Hokuto banged his hand on the table.

Shintarou jumped a little on his feet from shock. "Chill. Are you jealous? You do know there's always no strings attached with Juri. Oh, and if you're falling for him that means I'd have to find someone else to have meaningless sex with, meaning you would have to help me look for one."

Hokuto let out a sigh of relief that Shintarou got the person wrong. It wasn't about Juri at all but Taiga. He took his bag with him and headed home. He was in a daze the whole night. He didn't have the energy to cook for himself and simply ate convenience store-bought onigiri for dinner. A million thoughts ran through his mind worrying about every possible thing that could happen depending on Juri's mood.

For the first time in a really long time, Hokuto experienced a sleepless night.

* * *

The following day, Juri and Taiga both arrived late for work. At the same time. And Taiga, still in yesterday's clothes. The two of them walking together while laughing to themselves. 

Hokuto tried to focus on practice. Tried to take his mind off of Juri and Taiga. Juri and Taiga. Juri and Taiga together. Juri and Taiga in each other's arms. God damn it. He stomped a little too hard and exerted too much force in his dance to let out his frustration.

During the rehearsal break, Hokuto watched them. Juri and Taiga were more handsy and touchy today. Of course, no else was reading too much into the situation apart from Hokuto. He watched them while drinking his bottled water, he didn't even realize when he had finished it. He took another one and gulped it down.

"Whoa, slow down or you'll finish every water bottle on this table," Shintarou laughed trying to ease up a tensed up Hokuto. He followed his line of sight and found that Hokuto was watching Juri and Taiga. "I wouldn't read too much in the situation." He was shaking his head.

After rehearsals were done, Hokuto stayed behind to answer some interview questions. Taiga was still in the dressing room reading a manga even though rehearsals finished hours ago. Hokuto gently shut the door to not disturb Taiga. While fixing his things, Hokuto heard the lock on the door click.

Taiga hugged him from behind but there was something different, he was shivering as if he was nervous about something. Hokuto looked at their reflection, Taiga was biting down on his lip and had hints of pink on his cheeks.

Taiga moved his head and leaned it on Hokuto's back before talking. "Can I come over later?" He took in a deep breath before continuing. "And maybe stay until the next day. We're both free tomorrow according to the manager." He buried his face further in Hokuto's back, seemingly embarrassed about what he had just said.

Hokuto had plans to go shopping with his friend but that could wait another day. It's not every day that Taiga wants to spend more than the night over at his place anyway.

"Anything in particular that you want to eat for breakfast and dinner? So I could hit the grocery while you take the things you need from your house," Hokuto caressed Taiga's arms, trying to soothe him.

"I'll leave it up to you. I'm the one imposing already."

"It's nothing really."

They left the dressing room together but went their separate ways once they were out of the building.

Hokuto couldn't help but wonder why Taiga was acting like that earlier. Like he was nervous about something. But Hokuto couldn't really think of anything right now, too preoccupied with making sure he bought Taiga's favorite drink and snacks. He's heard Taiga complain how cold it was lately so he figured it will be good to prepare something warm for their dinner.

It wasn't like it was Taiga's first time in his apartment but there was just something about his extended visit that made Hokuto nervous. He even changed his sheets to fresh ones and dusted off his bed before showering. He even had another new bar of soap just in case Taiga might need it. In fact, he had a new set of almost everything: toothbrush, toothpaste, shampoo, and for the love of him, he didn't know what had gotten into him but he even bought tissues.

Hokuto cleaned up his place while the beef was still on the stove, checking on it from time to time if it was soft enough. He made beef and tomato stew and stood in his kitchen proudly when he did not mess it up, even if it was his first time making it, smiling smugly to his invincible audience. He left it on the stove, for now, and went over everything again, making sure he didn't forget anything. Even Taiga's preferred cold tea was already cold enough but stayed in the refrigerator for now.

When the doorbell rang, Hokuto took off his apron and straightened up. Why was he so damn worked up? Opening the door, he quickly stepped back to let Taiga in. He noticed that Taiga looked nervous about something like Taiga was thinking deeply about something. He was getting worried so he greeted him the way they always greeted each other whenever Taiga arrived at his apartment, he embraced him.

Taiga squirmed a little before wrapping his arms around Hokuto's waist. He took in deep breaths just so he could bask a little in Hokuto's scent, the smell of his safety. He wanted to stay a little more engulfed by Hokuto's warmth but unfortunately, Taiga's stomach grumbled.

Hokuto lightly patted Taiga's head. "I made beef and tomato stew. Wait in the kitchen, okay? I'll take your stuff to my room."

Taiga was quiet over dinner and Hokuto was getting nervous that he might have messed up the stew. But Taiga was eating it one spoonful after another. Hokuto tried ridding them of the silence by asking Taiga if he liked the stew to which Taiga nodded with a smile on his face.

Hokuto noticed that Taiga kept stealing glances at him. Why would he need to do that, really? It’s just the two of them here anyway. Every time he caught Taiga staring at him, the older looked back down on his soup. He’s starting to wonder if there was something wrong with his face. He tried to rack his brain to think of something. There was Taiga’s recent breakup but they were already chatting happily a day after that. It wouldn’t be a work thing, Taiga was talking lightly about work the other day. There was that thing Hokuto wanted to stray his thoughts away from but still ended up thinking about, Taiga spending the night at Juri’s place. Juri’s place. Juri’s place which Juri lived in alone. He shook his head as if by doing so the thought would get out of his head on its own.

Taiga found himself focusing on Hokuto’s fingers, how different they were from his. Then his eyes ran over the veins on Hokuto’s arms and god damn it, why did Hokuto wear short sleeves today of all days. And damn everything that is happening with Hokuto’s rainbow-colored shirt that had a collar hanging so low Taiga could see Hokuto’s collarbones. He focused his attention back to his bowl realizing he had already eaten everything and was stirring his spoon in a bowl filled with air.

“Taiga,” Hokuto’s voice snapped him back to reality. “Are you… Uhm… are you okay?”

“Yeah,” Taiga nervously chuckled. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“It’s just that -”

“Bathroom,” Taiga stood up. “Thank you for the meal.”

Hokuto finished cleaning up the dishes almost at the same time as Taiga coming out to the living room already in his own gray sweatpants and sweatshirt. He joined him in the living room but Taiga did not move from the other end of the sofa, something Taiga did not normally do as the older always rested his head on Hokuto’s lap whenever they stayed in the living room watching a movie until they felt sleepy enough for bed. He noticed Taiga kept fidgeting with the blanket and he re-adjusted the air conditioner’s temperature, thinking maybe Taiga was feeling cold.

Taiga’s leg jerked and hit Hokuto’s thigh, startling him a little.

“Sorry,” Taiga cleared his throat but said nothing more. Trying hard to just focus his eyes and attention on whatever was playing on the television even if his mind was really somewhere else.

Hokuto figured it must have been because Taiga wasn’t used to not stretching out on his couch and so he wanted to re-adjust Taiga’s position and let his legs rest over his lap but when he touched Taiga, it wasn’t even that long yet he barely grazed him, Taiga flinched. Taiga has never reacted to him like this before, at least not when they were alone in his apartment. If we were talking about normal here it was always Taiga that initiates contact between them, Hokuto was always just ready to give in to whatever the other wants but at the same time not stepping into territories unknown and foreign to Taiga without the other asking for it.

Taiga repositioned himself, sitting with his knees up in front of him, wrapping his own arm around them. Eyes still not leaving the television. Hokuto was getting worried, nervous, and honestly about to be pushed off the edge. He tried to replay the whole day in his mind, he was always watching Taiga so he was bound to remember if something went wrong during rehearsals today. But nothing, everything went well today and Taiga was praised as usual. Then the thought of what happened at Juri's place came to him and he wondered if that was the reason behind Taiga being nervous. Did Taiga come here because he needed someone to talk to about it? And of course, the first person Taiga would think of to talk with was Hokuto, because it was always him that Taiga confided to with anything.

“Are you tired?” Taiga asked, finally breaking the silence between them.

“What?”

“Are you tired? Do you want to go to bed? Or…” Taiga bit his lip. Juri had walked him through things last night, different ways of how he could say it directly or indirectly but Taiga cringed from the memory and still couldn’t get himself to do it. “Do you want to chat a little while lying lazily in bed?”

“Are you tired?” Hokuto asked back.

“No,” Taiga answered immediately. “No. Just… Let’s go to the bedroom.” He buried his face between his knees, hiding his flushed face because of the thoughts in his head. Though he couldn’t yet tell Hokuto, not here where he could be seen clearly under the bright living room lights. Maybe, he thought, maybe if they weren’t in a well-lit room he might be able to say it. He wondered how on earth Juri was able to make it seem so easy to say and he wondered about Hokuto, how Hokuto would have handled the situation if it was him.

He let Taiga use the bathroom first to get ready for the night, trying his best to calm his racing heart as he smoothed out the wrinkles on the sheets, even though it won’t make any difference. He could hear the faint sound of the tap being turned on, towels rustling and teeth getting brushed, and each second that passed, only made him more nervous. 

Taiga’s been acting weird lately, and it worried him because it feels so foreign, and the fact that he was with Juri the other night doesn’t help either. Because what if? Then again, would Taiga really be here if it happened? Would he? 

A thousand reasons why and why not run through his head as he rolled his thumbs and tapped his feet on the floor. He won’t ask, and he’s not sure Taiga would even tell him even if he did. He finally has Taiga here for an extended night, he doesn’t want to ruin this rare occasion. 

When Taiga came back, he made sure the older had everything he needed for bed before he did his usual routine before bed. Looking at his own reflection in the mirror, he saw the slight flush on his cheeks, cursing himself for letting his thoughts wander on their own. Because what if Taiga wants to do something more than just sleep? There’s a small chance it’s possible, considering how it went last time, and if he’s being honest with himself, he might be more ready now than before. Just maybe. 

There was still the uncertainty about what Taiga had been doing with Juri, and while it’s not his business, he kind of wants to know, but at the same time he doesn’t. 

Hokuto shuffled back to the bedroom silently, in case Taiga nodded off, and he didn’t want to disturb him if that was the case. However, the older was still awake, skimming through a volume of his precious Conan manga on Hokuto’s bed. Taiga looked so relaxed, shoulders slumped, glasses on, and eyes focused on reading, and the image of it just fit with his bed. 

When he lifted the covers to crawl into the bed, Taiga looked up at him, closing the book, and then, the alarming nervousness was back in Taiga’s eyes. Hokuto raised an eyebrow in silent confusion, almost asking out loud if something was wrong. But he didn’t, and when his head hit the pillows, and Taiga put away his book, he felt how Taiga snuggled up close to him, arm slung around his waist, already beneath his shirt, and that simple touch burned worse than anything. He rested his chin on Taiga’s head, breathing in the faint scent of his, how familiar it was already, how calm it made him feel, but at the same time, he was reminded of how he only gets to smell it whenever Taiga was not in a relationship. How it was exclusive for him in all the worse ways for him. 

He brought one hand up to thread his fingers through Taiga’s hair, combing through them, marveling at how soft they are, and briefly wondering how Taiga would sound if he pulled on it. The change in Taiga’s breathing pattern told him that the older wants to say something but doesn’t know how to, and he’s very sure that Taiga is still nervous, but about what, he doesn’t know. 

“What’s on your mind?” he asked, words whispered into his hair and into the room, trying to keep it as casual as he can, not wanting to scare Taiga away. 

Taiga didn’t respond right away, breath hitching as Hokuto asked, arm around his waist tightening, but he got some kind of answer in the end.

“Do you ever think about sex?”

Hokuto almost choked, not anticipating that answer, and sputtered as he hoped Taiga wouldn’t notice his racing heart. It felt like it would jump out of his chest any second. 

“Well… I mean, yes? That’s… Uhm.. normal? I mean…” 

“Like what?” Taiga’s breathing seemed to have evened out, and it made him wonder briefly if this topic was what made Taiga walk on eggshells around him, and if it also had anything to do with Juri, and it felt weird to talk about it out loud, he rather shows it if he could choose, but he’s not sure if Taiga wants that. 

“Like… touching.. Uhm, kissing, making out… biting?” He replied, not fully sure himself what to actually answer because he can’t answer that he’s been thinking about Taiga recently, especially after last time. He couldn’t get Taiga’s soft moans out of his mind.

“Like last time?” 

Hokuto only nodded in response, knowing that Taiga could feel it. He felt how Taiga shifted in his embrace, and soon, he was face to face with Taiga, and even with lights out, he could see the nervousness shining in the older’s eyes. 

Taiga leaned in, pressing his lips to Hokuto’s, almost as a greeting, and Hokuto sighed into the kiss. Taiga’s soft lips were like whipped cream on ice cream, the cherry on top, and he could do this all day. He could get used to it, even if it would never lead to anything. 

He kissed the side of Taiga’s lips, both sides before he moved up to his cheekbones, kissing along it as he ran his fingers through his hair, softly pressing a kiss to his nose, then his eyelids, eyebrows, and lastly forehead, only to go the same route back to his lips. He could hear Taiga sigh contently with every kiss, shifting closer to Hokuto. 

Taiga’s hands roamed over his abs mindlessly, never straying too far up or too far down, and he figured that Taiga might have not gotten enough last time and the way his hands traveled over his body, made all of Taiga’s earlier nervousness seem even weirder. 

He couldn’t but gasp into the kiss when Taiga put more pressure into his touches, almost as if he’s prompting him to react more, and the older took that moment to slide his tongue inside Hokuto’s mouth. They exchanged a few slow but messy kisses before Hokuto accidentally tugged a bit too hard on Taiga’s hair. 

It caused him to dig his nails into Hokuto’s skin as he gasped, and Hokuto immediately broke the kiss, ready to apologize, once again, for doing something that abrupt. It wasn’t his intention, he had just acted purely on autopilot. 

“Do that again,” Taiga said, voice trembling slightly but if it was because of nervousness or excitement, Hokuto did not know. 

But he listened to Taiga anyway, locking their lips again, a bit firmer this time, kissing him until he could hear the soft vibrations of his moan coming, then he tugged at Taiga’s hair, enough to make the older gasp and moan into Hokuto’s mouth. The more he listened, the rougher he wanted to go, but he also knew that Taiga had no idea what was waiting for him if he did. 

He let Taiga pull off his shirt, briefly remembering how it felt the last time they came this far, and Hokuto's heart started to beat faster. Started to already crave more but his hands were still carefully tugging at Taiga's hair, kissing him breathless until Taiga got impatient and pulled away to get the damn shirt off Hokuto, wasting no time then to put his mouth back on Hokuto. 

“I turned my phone off,” Taiga said in between kisses, and Hokuto could care less right now, phone on or not.

They were soon down to only their underwear, a matching (unintended) pair of black boxers, and Taiga crawled back to straddle the taller, and with only their boxers on, it felt like the room was on fire all of a sudden. He could almost see the sparks between the two of them, tiny specks of lightning between them whenever they had to part for air. 

Taiga broke the kiss to drag his teeth along Hokuto’s jawline, slowly making his way down the long neck, paying extra attention to the protruding Adam’s apple, making Hokuto draw a breath in a mix of anticipation and pleasure. When he started to press a few, fluttering kisses onto Hokuto’s collarbones, the younger gasped out loud, feeling Taiga’s lips on his skin like scalding hot water. How in the hell could Taiga be such a natural at this when he’s not done it before?

Then, a brief flash of Juri flashed by his eyes, then a flash of him teaching Taiga all the dirty tricks he knew, and before he could a second thought about Juri, or anything related to Juri _and_ Taiga, said person licked his nipple, causing him to jerk his whole body slightly in surprise.

“You like that?”

The way Taiga asked was almost innocent, borderline sadistic, and Hokuto wasn’t sure if Taiga was aware of how much power he held over him right now. 

“I was just surprised, that’s all,” he tried to play it cool, not wanting Taiga to know just how much he liked it. Because he liked it a lot, mostly because it was Taiga. Then, again, he was indeed taken by surprise. 

He heard the older hum, not quite buying the answer, as he leaned back down to circle his tongue around the hardening nub, soon followed by a finger on his other. Hokuto’s hands returned to the back of Taiga’s head, tangling his fingers through the hair, trying to hold onto something, alternating between his hair and his shoulders as Taiga didn’t stop playing his nipples. 

When he couldn’t take it anymore, he pulled Taiga back up, latching onto his neck, dragging his fangs along it, and it took all his willpower to not bite down hard enough to make Taiga scream. He wanted it, leave some kind of proof but he also knew that it wasn’t a good idea, so he held back, even when he could feel Taiga’s body react every time he did something less gentle. 

It was then his turn to play with Taiga’s chest, showing him the wonders he’s learned through his own experiences, his hands traveling along Taiga’s sides to hold him steady.

“I think you should use your hands more, I like them on me,” Taiga gasped through hard pants and moans, hinting that Hokuto should touch him more, in other ways.

Hokuto paused for a second, thinking through his coming course of action before he went back up, kissing Taiga on the lips, and lifted one hand to caress Taiga’s flushed cheek, tinted with the mixture of arousal and nervousness. He took a moment to stare at Taiga, take in the features of the older, memorizing them in case he’ll never see them like this again, and Taiga’s simply beautiful. His hand brushed away some hair, time suspended in the air as he couldn’t think of anything else than Taiga - gorgeous, ethereal, stunning Taiga.

He ran a wiry finger down Taiga’s throat, imagining how it’d look and feel to put a mark there. He wants to, really bad but maybe it has to wait. It doesn’t stop him from wanting to. 

A hand ran down Taiga’s back as Taiga had enough of waiting and went back to kissing Hokuto’s neck, obviously impatient by now, and it felt different this time when he ran his hand over Taiga’s ass, grabbing it briefly. This time, Taiga didn’t react as strongly as the last time but he reacted nonetheless, and Hokuto furrowed his brows in worry.

“Okay?” 

Taiga didn’t answer at first, as if he was still contemplating something and as if something was still worrying him, and it made Hokuto worry that he did something wrong, or went too fast. But when Taiga breathed out a firm yes, Hokuto’s heart felt ten times lighter, letting out a breath he didn’t know he held, and his heart started to beat again. Even if it all still felt surreal, even if he still didn’t know if this is really okay - if it’s okay for _him_ to touch Taiga like this. 

It felt like a sin.

Their hips started to roll in time with each other, dancing together in sync like nothing before. He heard Taiga hold back a moan when their hard erections brushed against each other, and it only made him thrust his hips a little bit harder next time. He drank Taiga’s moans like they’re made out the finest wine, and when Taiga started to let out his voice, even more than before, Hokuto wanted so badly to record it all. 

It’s Taiga who made the first move to get fully naked, elegant fingers hooked the hem of Hokuto’s boxers, pulling them down, brushing against his cock as he moved, until Hokuto had to lift his hips to get them fully off. When Taiga marveled at the sight, part surprised, part even more turned on, Hokuto did what he does best, he stripped Taiga down to nothing. 

They engaged in another messy session of kisses as they kept grinding against each other. At some point, Hokuto sneaked a hand between them, wrapping his hand around both of them, almost biting Taiga as the older moans and jerks in his hold at the touch. 

As he stroked them, he wondered briefly who was harder - him or Taiga.

“That feels good,” Taiga ushered, urging Hokuto to kiss him more, as Hokuto kept stroking them, intentionally brushing his thumb over Taiga’s tip, smearing both of their pre-come all over them. 

He felt it when Taiga started to shudder, breath gone, and voice weak, and he knew that it was getting too much for the older. Hokuto was ready to finish it like that, knew that he was just a few strokes away from a release when Taiga stopped him. He raised his eyebrows at Taiga, silently telling him that it’s fine like this, they don’t have to do more, it’s enough like this because… Taiga’s (allegedly) first time shouldn’t be like this. 

“I want… more…” Taiga had never sounded weaker to Hokuto, even when his hand was wrapped around his wrist, carefully guiding it further back.

“We don’t have to—“ 

“I want to,” His grip on Hokuto tightened, voice turned a bit firmer, and while Hokuto could still see the nervousness in Taiga’s eyes, they didn’t scream of fear. He gulped, not sure whether it’s actually a good idea or not, but when Taiga spoke again, he knew he lost.

“I want you Hokuto.”

He brought them back together for a fierce kiss, more passionate than their previous ones, and Hokuto didn’t care that it might only be a one-sided passion because the combination of his name and Taiga’s wish made him lose it. 

Taiga responded with the same eagerness, the tension in his body slowly left him but only to return when Hokuto traced a finger around his rim. 

Hokuto wondered if Taiga regretted it already when the older stops him and broke the kiss between them. But no, Taiga scrambled over the bed, ass up in the air as he rummaged through his bag. 

He pulled it all up from his bag, dropped it on the bed, and Hokuto was surprised by the amount of content Taiga has brought with him. It was literally a sea of different condoms, in all sizes and variations, even brands he’s never heard of, and he also saw a bottle of flavored lube somewhere in the mess. 

It made him chuckle at the older, who only pouted in response, admitting he had no idea what to get, so he just followed a list. He heard Taiga ramble on about how he didn’t know about Hokuto and his dick, even if he’s seen it multiple times at work but it was different now. A lot more different. 

To Hokuto, it made sense why Taiga was nervous before, heading into this unknown territory, and he thought it was cute. He said it out loud to Taiga too as he picked up a bottle of regular lube and a condom package he’s familiar with. He put it between his teeth temporarily and carefully as he shoved the rest of the stuff on the floor, he’ll tidy that up later.

His eyes turned darker as he looked at Taiga, trying to make sure that Taiga wanted this (him) before he pulled him back in, letting Taiga straddle him as he poured the lube onto his fingers. The cold liquid felt weird according to Taiga, as it dripped onto him when Hokuto’s finger went back to tracing his rim but it’s nothing he hated. 

Hokuto took his time circling around Taiga’s entrance, made sure that he could see every slight reaction Taiga made before he carefully poked a finger past the muscle, pushing it in slowly. The moment it happened, Hokuto held his breath, internally worried to death because fuck, it’s happening. He tried to make his fingers work on autopilot, tried to remember all the times he’s done this before but at the same time be careful enough to not hurt Taiga. That’s the last thing he wanted to do. 

Although his careful approach drove Taiga nuts and impatient to the point he just dug his nails into Hokuto’s skin, and from the pressure alone, he knew that it’s definitely going to leave a mark or two, and it didn’t help when Taiga also bit his shoulder too. 

“I’m not made of glass, I can take this,” Taiga hissed and while Hokuto knew that Taiga’s trying to play though, as he could feel the trembles from the older, and it was different from aroused trembles.

“Having my cock inside you is very different from just fingers Taiga—”

“I don’t care, keep doing whatever you’re doing, please, oh shit—”

Taiga’s words got cut off as Hokuto pulled out and pushed in with two fingers, and Taiga’s words got replaced with a beautiful, long moan that only kept rising in volume as Hokuto scissored him open until he could push in three fingers knuckle-deep. Taiga felt so amazingly tight around him and he swore he could have finished just like this if he didn’t have the unsaid promise of more. 

“Come on now, Hokuto…”

It was not fair how easy it was for Taiga to use his name in situations like these. If only Taiga knew exactly how much it affected him it would be both a blessing and a curse. 

“I need to stretch you a bit more, three fingers might not be enough…”

“If you don’t hurry up, I will do it myself!” 

The image of Taiga preparing himself made Hokuto curl his finger involuntarily and it proceeded to make Taiga scream in pleasure, and he knew that he found a good spot, aiming to hit it again and again if it helped Taiga to relax even more - or at least keep him distracted. 

When Taiga almost begged him to give him more, a clear mess against Hokuto, he stopped, pulling his fingers out to turn to get the condom. 

As he tried to open it, Taiga snatched it out of his hands, and then suddenly, he slid down, and Hokuto didn’t grasp what was happening before he found Taiga wrapping his mouth around him, and oh shit. _Oh_ . _Shit_. 

His vision is flooded with bliss, mind blanking out as Taiga worked his mouth on him, and like everything else Taiga did, he’s a natural at this too. Swirled his tongue just right around him, his cock resting on his tongue as he took him a bit deeper before repeating the process, and the heat around him made him grow even harder. 

It took all of his willpower to not grab Taiga’s hair, hold him in place and fuck his mouth until he shoots his release all over his pretty face. If he did that, he’s sure Taiga would run away. 

He stopped Taiga when it got too much, barely getting a warning out, and the way Taiga popped off him is a sight he wants to experience over and over again, and his cock agreed too, twitching in excitement. 

Taiga opened the condom with shaking hands, the lube on it making it slightly difficult for him to roll it on Hokuto properly but in the end, he managed before he went to lay back on his back, spreading his legs in an inviting manner only Taiga can muster.

Hokuto positioned himself, the tip slowly pushed inside and despite his extended preparation earlier, he could feel just how tight Taiga was, even with just the head in.

“Shit, shit, shit, shit. you’re fucking huge —”

“It’s just the tip…” 

“Fuck —” he said but his hips met Hokuto’s slight push and he entered even more until he bottomed out. 

He let Taiga adjust to his size, caressing his face gently as Taiga tried to even his breathing and come back to his senses.

They went at it slowly, carefully, and gently, and Hokuto made sure that Taiga is not in any unnecessary discomfort. Until Taiga started to beg for more.

Hokuto groaned, low and raspy, as he couldn’t do much more than to listen to Taiga. He was both weak against Taiga's words and how he felt being inside of him. He hoisted Taiga up slightly, swung his leg over his shoulder, and when he moved even ever so slightly, it hit differently inside Taiga, causing him to see stars he’s never seen before. 

“Move,” And he did.

He wanted to go even faster, even deeper, even rougher but he wouldn’t do that now. Taiga needed to be able to walk later too. Not even when Taiga begged, almost cried, for more than what Hokuto was already giving him. For once, he’s not to give Taiga everything he wants. 

As he wrapped a hand around Taiga and stroked him in time with his thrusts, it didn’t take long before Taiga was losing it as Hokuto found the perfect spot inside Taiga. Hokuto followed soon after, finally letting himself drown in the intense pleasure he’s been swimming in since they began. 

When they came back down from their highs, Hokuto fell down beside Taiga, who immediately snuggled up beside him, not minding the mess at all, and ran a hand down Hokuto’s now sore arms. 

“That was …”

“Good?”

“I’d say different, but yes, also good, very good. Not that I have anything to compare it to but I’ve never felt anything like this before.”

Hokuto was slightly confused at that, his brain trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together. He was so sure that Taiga and Juri did something the other day. Even if Juri didn’t take his virginity, they sure did something, and it all didn’t make sense to Hokuto.

“Why different? Was it not as you’ve imagined, or liked?” he asked instead of voicing his worries. It’s partly because he’s worried he should have done something else, maybe listened a bit more to Taiga, despite being the more experienced, and partly because he’s still a coward.

“It was nothing like the porn Juri showed me the other day when I went home with him,” Taiga admitted in a low voice, eyes avoiding Hokuto’s as if he was revealing some kind of deep, dark secret that was very embarrassing. “This felt more… raw, more real. The guys on the video didn’t seem like they actually enjoyed it despite coming.”

It’s mostly because porn didn’t involve feelings or plot, but Hokuto didn’t say that out loud because of course, it’s different. Despite knowing deep inside that this maybe didn’t mean anything to Taiga, it meant something to Hokuto, and he would never, not with Taiga, make it not a big deal. 

“Why did you go to Juri?” he blurted out, curiousity finally taking over, and he felt how Taiga fidgeted before answering.

“I was… a bit curious about how it could have gone if we weren’t interrupted that day. I couldn’t stop thinking about it, what my first time would be like. Then I couldn’t think about anyone else than you.”

It’s a slight shimmer of hope, maybe, just maybe Taiga felt something too for him. But he didn’t want to hold it close in case it’s not true. 

“But… why me? You had Juri, and I’m sure that he—”

“I rather have my first with you rather than someone who’s bound to leave me eventually.“

It held so much meaning to it, and Hokuto almost grasped the light, almost thought it is special - that Taiga was maybe seeing something in him, in _them_. 

“And Juri mentioned that you… have quite the stamina too..”

“Shut up…” 

Hokuto’s cheeks turned red, embarrassment crawled out because damn it Juri, he shouldn’t be blabbering about others, but he looked at Taiga nonetheless, and he’s glowing and had never looked more beautiful. Then, he focused on the faint marks he’s left, strategically placed so no one else would see them. He wanted to mark him more, so much more. Wanted to show the world that he did that to Taiga. 

“I know that.. I’m not your first, I wouldn’t have asked you of that if that was the case, and it’s okay. I’m just glad that you then at least could guide me, and you did it brilliantly.”

It dawned on Hokuto then, that no matter what, no matter what happens with them, this was his. Taiga’s first time was his and his alone. Nobody would ever be able to take that from him. At least, that’s what he got to keep of Taiga if he couldn’t keep the rest.

When Hokuto cleaned them up, he noticed how Taiga has reverted back to being restless and embarrassed again. 

“Maybe I shouldn’t have changed my sheets if I knew we’d end up like this,” he joked when he wiped off some of their release on the sheets, in hope that it’d relax Taiga, but the older turn even redder and more embarrassed.

“Don’t talk about it out loud, please.” 

From the way Taiga was acting, Hokuto knew that the other was backtracking everything and reliving the moments they just shared together, and it’s adorable. He kissed the top of Taiga’s head before he went to throw the tissues away, on his way back, he picked up Taiga’s disregarded shirt and boxers and dressed him before himself. 

“It’s alright,” he said to Taiga as he held him close, just as Taiga was on the edge of falling asleep. “I’ll do anything for you.”

That’s the closest to a confession he’s ever made, and he’s not lying. No matter what Taiga went through, no matter how many partners he went through, he was there, and he’ll be there. He wanted to let Taiga know that. That he could come here anytime and just be himself. That Hokuto was going to be his calm shore in the stormy sea. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for taking time to read this. It warms my heart that someone out there took time to read my work. I am open to suggestions and comments. A kudos would make me smile knowing that someone out there liked what I put out :)
> 
> If you want to talk or have any suggestions or requests hit me up at Twitter @geeelatinnn


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